By Pastor Edgard Torres, Jr.

I read a devotional today which got me thinking about relationships and sacrifice. The devotional talked about Abraham and how Abraham was called a friend of God. “And the scripture was fulfilled that says, ‘Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,’ and he was called God’s friend.” (James 2:23) As you look at Abraham’s life, you see that Abraham gave up a lot. He left his family, his home and go to a foreign land. God promises to bless him with a son and after God does, he asks him to sacrifice the very promise given to him by God. What a sacrifice to make! God provides a ram in the bush so that he did not have to literally sacrifice his son. Nevertheless, for Abraham, he was willing to sacrifice his only Son for God.

There is no relationship without sacrifice. A relationship where one person gives so much and the other doesn’t do anything in return is wrong. At the same time, someone who expects the other to do so much, but is not willing to sacrifice themselves isn’t good either. It can be seen as unfair, unrealistic and even abusive. Janet Jackson in 1986 sang the song “What Have You Done for Me Lately?” a song about this very same issue. A woman in a relationship where she feels like she’s doing all the work in the relationship, and the man no longer shows any love, any concern, any sacrifice, any work on their part for each other.

A great book to read when talking about couples is Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs. The book discusses the woman’s need to feel loved and a man’s need to feel respected. You see how the needs work together and even against each other in a relationship. When a woman is loved, she gives the man respect. When the woman gives respect, the man responds in love. Unfortunately the opposite is also true. A woman who’s not loved responds with disrespect and the man not respected responds in an unloving way. So how do you break the cycle of disrespect or of not feeling loved? In essence, according to Eggerichs, the one partner has to choose to show love or respect despite what the other partner may show or react with. This requires risk and sacrifice on either part but in the end it’s worth it. Eventually, there is a change in the vicious cycle and both begin to have their needs of love and respect met again.

How does this relate to our relationship with God? Many times in our relationship with God we expect so much. We seek his power, his presence, his blessings, his grace and mercy, and so on. He gives it to us. However, we don’t always think about our part in the relationship. Scripture says “The most important one,” answered Jesus, “is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one.30 Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ 31 The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:29-31) God’s love for us is great. “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:37-39) His love is there for us but the question is, is our love there for him?

How do we show our love for him? The answer is simple: Obey him. Jesus said “If you love me, keep my commands.” (John 14:15) It is that simple and yet for many of us, that can be so difficult. But the benefits outweigh the difficulties. There is nothing like God’s love for us. But it requires our submission to him.

I encourage you today today to love God and follow him. It is worth it. Give it all to him today. And remember, every relationship requires sacrifice, but if the relationship is truly worth it then the benefits outweigh the sacrifice.

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